Plot Boiler Read online

  Praise for the New York Times Bestselling Black Cat Bookshop Mysteries

  Literally Murder

  “Another wonderful installment . . . If you’re anything like me and your life revolves around cats and books, you will never go wrong in picking up a Black Cat Bookshop Mystery!”

  —Melissa’s Mochas, Mysteries & Meows

  “This book is fun! And scary, interesting, and hard to put down . . . It is a delight to read, with just the right amounts of mystery, tension, panic, and calm . . . [A] new adventure with Hamlet can’t come too soon!”

  —Open Book Society

  Words with Fiends

  “Brandon again creates a lively whodunit . . . An endearing entry in a sturdy series, Words with Fiends should find many friends.”

  —Richmond Times-Dispatch

  “[A] finely tuned whodunit that quickly became a page-turner . . . Nonstop action . . . Great cast. This is one of the best books yet in this delightfully engaging series.”

  —Dru’s Book Musings

  “Really fun . . . Extremely clever . . . This is a sensational cozy mystery series that just gets better and better.”

  —Melissa’s Mochas, Mysteries & Meows

  A Novel Way to Die

  “Our favorite sleuthing cat is back . . . This series really does have it all: [a] bookstore, cats, likable, relatable characters, and a strong mystery.”

  —Cozy Mystery Book Reviews

  “[A] delightful way to spend an afternoon. This book is fun, fun, fun! Ali Brandon is a great voice in the cozy mystery world!”

  —Socrates’ Book Reviews

  “Fun to read . . . The mystery was very good and the cat really added some interest to the story.”

  —Fresh Fiction

  Double Booked for Death

  “A fun mystery that kept me guessing to the end!”

  —Rebecca M. Hale, New York Times bestselling author of How to Catch a Cat

  “Clever . . . Bibliophiles, ailurophiles, and mystery fans will enjoy Double Booked for Death.”

  —Richmond Times-Dispatch

  “A charming, cozy read, especially if cats are your cup of tea. Make sure the new Black Cat Bookshop series is on your bookshelf.”

  —Elaine Viets, national bestselling author of Catnapped!

  “Hamlet is a winner, and so is his owner. The literary references in this endearing debut will make readers smile, and the ensemble characters hold promise for fun titles to come.”

  —Library Journal

  “[An] outstanding debut to a very promising new series . . . The characters are interesting and smart, the mystery is clever and provides clues the reader will notice but [doesn’t] let the cat out of the bag prematurely . . . I had such fun reading about Darla and her cohorts, and found Hamlet’s antics made me smile . . . If you enjoy a cozy mystery, a clever cat, a bookstore setting, and smart, realistic characters, you are sure to enjoy Double Booked for Death.”

  —MyShelf.com

  “This first entry in the Black Cat Bookshop Mystery series is a harbinger of good books to follow . . . In case you are wondering, Hamlet fulfills his role as sleuth by knocking down books containing hints about the killer’s identity. [Brandon] does a fine job with the plot and execution.”

  —Mystery Scene

  “Those who like clever animals but draw the line at talking cats will feel right at home.”

  —Publishers Weekly

  “The first Black Cat Bookshop Mystery is an entertaining whodunit starring a brilliant feline (who does not speak in human tongues), a beleaguered new store owner and an ex-cop. The story line is fast-paced as Hamlet uncovers the clues that the two females working the case follow up on . . . Fans will enjoy.”

  —The Mystery Gazette

  Berkley Prime Crime titles by Ali Brandon

  Black Cat Bookshop Mysteries

  DOUBLE BOOKED FOR DEATH

  A NOVEL WAY TO DIE

  WORDS WITH FIENDS

  LITERALLY MURDER

  PLOT BOILER

  Leonardo da Vinci Mysteries writing as Diane A. S. Stuckart

  THE QUEEN’S GAMBIT

  PORTRAIT OF A LADY

  A BOLT FROM THE BLUE

  An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC

  375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014

  PLOT BOILER

  A Berkley Prime Crime Book / published by arrangement with Tekno Books

  Copyright © 2015 by Tekno Books.

  Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.

  BERKLEY® PRIME CRIME and the PRIME CRIME design are trademarks of Penguin Random House LLC.

  For more information, visit penguin.com.

  eBook ISBN: 978-1-101-60596-7

  PUBLISHING HISTORY

  Berkley Prime Crime mass-market edition / November 2015

  Cover illustration by Ross Jones.

  Interior text design by Kristin del Rosario.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Version_1

  This one is for my nonwriter friends. They may not understand the fear of a missed deadline, or the horror of a terrible cover, or the thrill of a great review, but they love me, anyhow. Thanks, y’all.

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  The writing never gets easier, but the support seems to broaden with every book I publish. Thanks to my friends and family, who pretend not to notice when they catch me acting out an iffy scene or wrangling aloud with a pesky bit of dialogue. Gratitude to various random acquaintances who don’t mind sharing their particular expertise when I need some oddball plot question answered. And virtual hugs to all the folks who follow me and Hamlet on Facebook and Twitter. Your comments, questions, and kitty pictures are greatly appreciated.

  CONTENTS

  Praise for the New York Times Bestselling Black Cat Bookshop Mysteries

  Berkley Prime Crime titles by Ali Brandon

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Acknowledgments

  CHAPTER ONE

  CHAPTER TWO

  CHAPTER THREE

  CHAPTER FOUR

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CHAPTER SIX

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAPTER NINE

  CHAPTER TEN

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  ONE

  “I don’t know what they say here in Brooklyn, but back home in Texas, they call it crawfishing on a deal. Fine, I’ll be looking for it. Good-bye.”

  Had she been talking on a landline, Darla Pettistone would have slammed down the telephone receiver with a satisfying crash. But the call had come in
on her cell phone, so she’d had to content herself with hitting the “end” key with more force than necessary. Then she slumped back in her vintage bistro chair and stared at her best friend, Jacqueline, aka Jake, Martelli, in dismay.

  Jake raised a black eyebrow. “Crawfishing?”

  “Crawfishing,” Darla confirmed. “It means going back on your word. Which is what Johnny Mack just did to me.”

  “And Johnny Mack is—?”

  “—the lead singer for Johnny Mack’s Electric Trombone Band. They’re the ones my planning committee hired for our Fourth of July block party on Friday.”

  “Oh, yeah, the guys who play over at Oompah’s,” Jake replied, naming the biergarten-style restaurant across town where she and Darla had eaten a time or two.

  The two women were sitting in the upstairs lounge of Darla’s bookstore, a space that was now, after a recent remodel, somewhat unoriginally known as Pettistone’s Fine Coffee Bar. The coffee bar had been open for a little more than four months now, but already Darla had seen a small if tidy uptick in her bookstore’s monthly profits, which she directly attributed to this new addition. While previously their customers hadn’t really started rolling in until noon, now she had a good ten or so regulars at her door each morning soon after opening time. After purchasing a newspaper or magazine, these newly minted regulars then rushed upstairs for a latte or other specialty drink crafted by her salesclerk-turned-barista, Robert.

  Not that she had visions of competing with the local coffee shop, Perky’s, when it came to cornering the coffee market. Still, it was already obvious that she’d made a sound business decision with the remodel. Of course, the entire project had been something of a leap of faith from the start, given that she’d been on a working vacation in Florida during the construction. In her absence, she had turned over responsibility for managing the remodel to her store manager, Professor James T. James. But James and the project both had come through with flying colors, even despite Darla’s subsequent misgivings about the somewhat shady contractor she’d hired. What had previously been a lounge area was now a mini bistro complete with front and back service counters featuring lots of dark, glossy wood and copper.

  Setting down her cup of latte, Jake went on, “What’s the matter, kid, did they change their minds about trading in their lederhosen for red, white, and blue?”

  “Worse! He cancelled the gig on me.” Darla felt her redhead’s temper start to flare. Taking a deep breath, she tamped down her indignation and managed a more even tone.

  “It turns out Oompah’s owner decided he wants to stay open on the Fourth, after all,” she went on. “He offered Johnny double his usual rate to play. So Johnny is celebrating his independence a few days early by taking Oompah’s money and running, while leaving us in the lurch.”

  “First things first,” the ex-cop turned private investigator urged as she used a paper napkin to mop up a bit of the foamy drink that she’d sloshed onto the glass-topped bistro table. “Tell him you want your deposit back ASAP. He gives you any guff, call the credit card company and dispute the charge.”

  “Already taken care of,” Darla gloomily replied as the sound of typewriter keys emanated from her cell phone, indicating an arriving text. “Johnny just returned the deposit electronically . . . less a processing fee,” she added with a frown as she noticed her original transfer was a few dollars short.

  “So charge the loss to the block party committee fund and book another band.”

  “It’s not the money. In case you haven’t checked the calendar this morning, today is Tuesday the first, meaning that the Fourth of July is only three days away. No way will I be able to find a replacement for them at this late date. What are we going to do? What’s a block party without a band?”

  The pair considered the problem with mutual frowns for a few moments; then Jake snapped her fingers.

  “Boom boxes,” was the PI’s practical suggestion. “I’ve got a pretty decent one stashed in my closet if you need to borrow it. And I’m sure some of the other store owners have some sort of sound systems. You can set up zones in front of the booths.”

  Darla shrugged. “I guess that could work, but it’s not the same as live music, which is what we advertised.”

  “Aw, c’mon, kid. You could do patriotic music over here, oldies down the street, jazz across the way, and maybe some of that Auto-Tune/rap/Top 40 stuff for the kids at the end of the block. It’ll be a heck of a lot cheaper than hiring a band.”

  “I guess that’s better than nothing,” Darla grudgingly agreed. “I’ll put that down as plan B and run it by the committee. Thanks, Jake.”

  While Jake returned her attention to her latte, Darla penned a few notes on her aluminum clipboard—the heavy-duty type, like contractors used—which had been her ever-present companion since late spring. Fancy office supplies aside, budget had dogged Darla ever since she’d had the idea a couple of months earlier to organize the local business owners and put on a block party for the holiday—actually more of a street fair scheduled for the afternoon of July Fourth. The plan, as she’d originally pitched it to her fellow retailers, was to invite the public to shop and mingle out on the street in a partylike atmosphere. Though she suspected most of the attendees would be friends and family of the participating shop owners, she hoped the event also would draw in new customers while giving an advertising boost to their little business enclave.

  Darla shook her head as she recalled how she’d jumped into this new project with both feet, even as James reminded her that they’d barely gotten past the coffee bar’s grand opening. While he’d muttered about type A personalities and overachievers, she had shown him a list she’d compiled of independent bookstores that had recently shut their doors permanently. James had promptly hopped on board the block party train at that point.

  While all the retailers would be chipping in a share of the expenses, Darla had ponied up the lion’s share of the budget herself, meaning she was doubly invested in the event’s success. The band was meant to be the biggest—as well as the most expensive—part of the attraction, along with door prizes and samples of food and drink from the local cafés. But she reminded herself that even without Johnny Mack and his boys, they’d still have plenty of other live entertainment.

  TAMA—the Tomlinson Academy of Martial Arts, where Darla took a weekly self-defense class—was scheduled to give hourly karate demonstrations. And students from the nearby Brooklyn Modern Dance Institute were working on flash mob routines, where they would pretend to be part of the block party crowd and then break into highly choreographed dances. Penelope Winston, BMDI’s owner, had shown the committee online examples of that kind of public stunt, and everyone had agreed it would be perfect for the block party.

  And, of course, Darla wasn’t about to leave Pettistone’s Fine Books’ official mascot out of the festivities.

  She spared a fond look for the oversized black cat snoozing on a nearby bistro chair in defiance of health department ordinances. She had inherited Hamlet from her great-aunt, Dee, along with the three-story Brooklyn brownstone that housed the bookstore and her apartment (as well as Jake’s garden apartment below). While moving from her native Texas to New York and taking over the book business had involved a definite learning curve, it was becoming a full-time cat owner that had practically required a degree in feline psychology. Frankly, Darla still considered herself an amateur in the field. But she was learning—mainly by making Hamlet the star of the show, so to speak. His silhouette graced the Pettistone’s coffee mugs, and Robert even drew foam cat faces in the lattes.

  For the first couple of weeks after the coffee bar was in business, she was sure it was the distinctive steam hiss of the frothing attachment that attracted the feline. Then she’d caught Robert pouring Hamlet a little saucer of steamed milk when he thought Darla wasn’t watching. That, apparently, was the true lure. But as the occasional dairy offerings seemed to
have no ill effect on Hamlet’s digestion, and since it further cemented the “bro”-ship between cat and youth, Darla pretended not to notice.

  “Oh, by the way, I’ve put Hamlet on the entertainment list, too,” she told Jake.

  “Don’t tell me, you’re going to play the Karate Kitty video, aren’t you?” Jake said with a shake of her curly head and a mock groan.

  “I was thinking about it. I have one of those electronic picture frames that plays videos, so I figured I could set that up at our booth.”

  Hamlet had been the star of a viral video on YouTube that featured him imitating Darla as she’d competed at a karate tournament. The video’s popularity had then led to Hamlet being invited as guest of honor at a cat show in Florida earlier in the year. The cat show folks had taken one of the original cell phone uploads of Hamlet’s antics and enhanced it, resulting in a clever montage put to the tune of “Eye of the Tiger.” Darla had watched that video probably twenty times and, despite the fact that she basically was playing Odie the dog to Hamlet’s Garfield the cat, laughed every single time.

  “Hamlet’s starting to gain a real following locally,” she reminded Jake. “When people find out that he’s also an Internet star, maybe they’ll come to the store to meet him, and hopefully buy a book or two while they’re here.”

  Her friend nodded. “This day and age, you gotta do what you can to draw in the business. That’s why I’m offering free ten-minute consultations during the block party. You know, for all those people who are dying to hire a private investigator to check up on their cheating spouses but don’t know how to go about doing it. Speaking of which”—she paused and glanced at her watch—“I’ve got a client conference in five, so I’d better get going. This one’s a paying client, so I better not be late.”

  Darla checked her own watch.

  “Have fun. The block party committee will be meeting here in about twenty minutes to finalize our last-minute items for Friday.”

  Then, knowing her friend’s aversion to early mornings, Darla added with a mischievous grin, “You sure you don’t want me to add you to one of the teams? We’ll be hanging bunting starting at dawn, and we could use someone tall.”